Indie Squid Kid

We have arrived at the end of Action Figure Week, and now it is finally time to talk about George Lucas’ favorite cephalopod—Squid Head!

To me (and, I assume, nearly anyone else who was born in the 1970’s), Star Wars toys are the quintessential action figures. I actually don’t remember the first time I saw Star Wars, or when I got my first Star Wars action figure, but in all but my very earliest memories I am already a fanatic, and I seem to have always had Star Wars toys.

Debuting in 1977, Kenner’s 3 ¾” figures were revolutionary, displacing 12″ dolls (like G.I. Joe) as the industry standard, and this size continues to dominate the action figure market today. The original toy line was produced until 1985, and Kenner revived it in 1995. There has been a steady stream of Star Wars figures on toy store shelves ever since.

Squid Head™ (Kenner, 1983)

Part of the first wave of figures for Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi, Squid Head appears only briefly in the crowd of aliens that reside in the palace of Jabba The Hutt. In fact, this figure is a great example of two long-time Lucas traditions: 1) making toys of obscure characters, and 2) giving those characters dumb, yet descriptive, names. And like all obscure Star Wars characters, Squid Head’s back story would be fleshed out over time through the RPGs, comics, and novels of the Expanded Universe.

As it turns out, his name is actually Tessek, and he is a Quarren, an alien species from the ocean planet Dac. Dac is also the homeworld of the Mon Calamari (such as Admiral “It’s a traaaap!” Ackbar). Despite their name, the Mon Calamari are actually fish people, not cephalopods, and the two species have a long history of antagonism, often ending up on opposite sides of various galactic conflicts.

So, even though he is from a species native to the deep ocean, Tessek somehow ended up on the desert world of Tatooine in the employ of Jabba the Hutt…as his accountant. I suppose it is best not to dwell on the unlikeliness of an air-breathing humanoid species evolving from deep-sea invertebrates (presumably) on a planet with very little dry land.

Anyway, getting back to the figure, it is fairly obvious why this guy is called “Squid Head.” His beak-like mouth is surrounded by four tentacles, and two fin-like structures project off either side of his head. The suction cups on his finger tips provide a final squiddy touch. The toy comes with a blaster pistol and a real cloth cloak and skirt (which is held in place with a silver plastic cummerbund).

I lost my original Squid Head figure when I was a kid. I picked up this replacement on the collectors market, so it’s in fairly pristine condition. I do still have the card that my original figure came packaged on (above). It features a nice close-up shot of the Quarren accountant enjoying a tasty beverage on board Jabba’s Sail Barge. As a bonus, you can just make out my sad nine-year old attempts at drawing Imperial Shuttles, an AT-AT walker, and some kind of creature that is maybe supposed to be a Tauntaun.

Tessek™ (Hasbro, 2000)

Even though Kenner began producing Star Wars action figures again in 1995, it would be five years before they made an updated Squid Head. (2000 was also the year that Hasbro, which had owned Kenner since 1991, consumed the Kenner brand for good.) The new Tessek figure was released as part of Star Wars: Power of the Jedi, a toy line that contained a combination of figures from the original trilogy and the recently released prequel, Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace. The new Tessek figure is more detailed than the original and has molded plastic clothes. The colors of this figure more closely match the way the character appeared in the the original movie.

The Star Wars toy line has undergone seemingly constant rebranding over the past 14 years, and Star Wars: The Legacy Collection is the name of the current line (although I think the packaging has been redesigned again). It includes characters and vehicles from all six films as well as the two Clone Wars animated series.

Quarren™ Soldier (Hasbro, 2008)

This figure, the only non-Tessek Quarren figure to-date, is a “realistic” version of the alien warriors as portrayed in the Chapter 5 of Genndy Tartakovsky’s Star Wars: Clone Wars animated series (2003-2005). In that segment (which is my favorite after Chapter 13, where Mace Windu single-handedly defeats an entire army of droids), amphibious Jedi Knight Kit Fisto leads an battalion of Clone scuba troopers and Mon Calamari knights against Separatist battle droids and the Quarren Isolation League. Here’s a link to the segment on YouTube. I highly recommend the entire Tartakovsky Clone Wars series, which is available on DVD.

There are a few other Quarren characters from the Star Wars Universe that have yet to be given action figure treatment, but I’m sure it’s just a matter of time.